you all screw up from time to time, yet rarely do you want to admit your faults or apologize. it's so much easier to blame someone else for your screw-ups. you may even want to sue someone for your own assholiness. no worries, i am here to help you. hell, i'm so used to being blamed for every damn thing, even i will believe i was at fault for your crap. i will take the blame for almost anything. late for work? i turned off your alarm clock. caught speeding? i put my foot on the gas against your will. marriage gone to shit? all my fault. some dog crapped in your yard? no, it was me. i will take the blame for you.    read my response... you can then point it out to all you care to show. it's that easy. updated: 10.23.04

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Chelle, Glasgow, Scotland, damn you. i was supposed to be going out this weekend to get totally pissed. but at the last minute, my babysitter backs out of it. and i blame you. what the hell do you think you were playing at? aaarrrggggghhhhhhh........ well, i needed a babysitter this weekend too. your sitter was more then willing to come to my house and i don't even have any kids. keller, bribane, austrialia, I don't have a woman tonight to be with. all my friends are out with thier girls corking them rotten while i sit here alone my girl left me for some indian guy I blame you it's your fault i am all alone. sad you are left to your own self loving, but your girl and i, i mean, oh, nevermind. Amy, St. Louis, MO., USA., Heyou, I have a most unsightly blemish on my chin that you are responsible for. I am the maid of honor in a wedding this weekend and will most likely be featured in dozens of photos. This blemish will be preserved on celluloid for eternity and I'm very angry at you for doing this to me. I will be sending photographic evidence as soon as it becomes available. You may also be responsible for my big butt. amy, i crept in on you as you slept and applied a special blend of turbo-zit bacterium, mcdonald's french fry grease, and 'dr. clogs skin pore sealer' to your face. this zit recipe has been known to create a glorious zit as big as the face it infects. please send me the pictures of you and your second head in your typically hideous maid of honor dress that i picked out just for you. seeing that you sleep naked, i applied a hefty zit to your ass as well. you can thank me later.